Adventures of a Gringa in Rio

gossip

Naturally, when I was coming home without my camera, I stumbled through the novela set and all of the stars were doing a fight scene between two women. I watched one of the takes with a huge smile on my face because there is nothing more ridiculous than a fake cat fight in the middle of the street. The fugly Frankenstein male star was there too, even freakier-looking in real life than on TV.

So I came back here and grabbed my camera and went back through the set on my way to the grocery store. I got terrible pictures and all the stars had disappeared when I got back, though I did almost literally run into a famous Globo actor whose name I don't know but he is fat, in his 50s, has curly hair and almond-shaped eyes but isn't Asian. Anybody? I also passed the director, who was flipping out and screaming that he couldn't film but the sun was going down soon and he had scenes to finish.

At the supermarket, I encountered a new thing: the tomatao. Literally "big tomato," it is an enormous, frighteningly chunky tomato. I was going to buy one but they looked kind of gross. Also, on the way home I got a picture of Hortifruti's latest fake movie poster campaign. I love all of them, but this one is very cute too:

stalkage

I love stalking my Feedjit map to see where all my readers come from. It just tickles me to think people in Morocco, South Korea, Armenia, the Netherlands Antilles, and Saudi Arabia all accessed my blog in one day! It is weird, though, that today someone accessed it from the same city in India where there was a terrible bombing (Jaipur). Weird. I also know some of the people who are reading it, like my friend in Ecuador, a fellow gringa in Mozambique, and a guy who always reads my blog from Venezuela (who are you guy?! Sign my guestbook. Speak Spanish to me! I'm in serious Spanish withdrawl).

Now if you will excuse me from stalking you all, I have to go stalk the novela on my street.

seriously.

Last week our landlord stopped by and asked Eli and I if we'd like a new wardrobe. Little did I know that saying yes would turn into an Ordeal.

So the story is that the landlord's kids have moved into the guy's second apartment, except they wanted different closets so we are moving out our current wardrobe (which is small) and moving in one of the ones from the other apartment. My landlord said his son and a guy would come by tonight after 6:30 to do the move.

At 8pm, my landlord called me to tell me the guys were coming up. I had 10 minutes to take out all of our clothes from the wardrobe and empty Eli's Drawer of Crap and move everything to make way for the new wardrobe. Somewhere along the line, I came back into the bedroom and I heard a hissing sound, like an egg frying quietly. At first I thought it might be the wind blowing through the window, since it tends to make weird noises, but this was a very distinct burning noise. So I finally managed to locate the source of the hissing and I realized somehow one of Eli's batteries had come in contact with a metal cup, both from the Drawer of Crap which I had put in a shopping bag. The battery was definitely sizzling. I panicked and managed to tweeze the battery out of the bag and now it is sitting quietly in the bathroom where it cannot harm anyone.

The men came up and first moved out our wardrobe and then started constructing the new one, piece by piece. While moving the old one out, they knocked over one of our shelf-drawer things in the living room, sending little rocks from our cactus flying. Our neighbors must be pissed because it's 10pm and they're still banging away. My landlord just arrived to oversee the job and to make me uncomfortable and guilty that our house isn't in perfect order (ha! order is a stretch for what it is right now). The good news is we have a huge closet that's almost ready, and after wanting to reorganize my stuff for so long, now I'm being forced to. Though we are moving out soon. That is so scary.

cold but not really

OK Cariocas, it's chilly, but it is definitely not cold. I saw all sorts of winter coats and boots today and I gotta say...you guys don't even know real cold. On the other hand, I was talking to another American teacher today who thinks the weather right now is balmy, so I suppose I've gotten a little too used to the heat, since I had on a sweatshirt today.

I taught my ballet class today and it went incredibly well. It is a zillion times easier to teach a small group of serious students than a big group of mixed students. It's a huge pleasure, is what it is. I could teach them all day long, I love them so. And they are so good and learning so fast.

I also saw Leandro the homeless kid today. He was running to catch the bonde and I almost didn't recognize him because he's grown out his hair to a small Afro puff, and he had on a Flamengo jersey. He also had a very mischievous glint in his eye and was carrying around what appeared to be half of a doll stroller. He jumped onto the streetcar with another homeless kid before I had the chance to say hi. It makes me happy just to see him though, to see he is OK and that someone seems to be sort of taking care of him.

new theme

Hi all, if you're having issues with my new blog theme, just hit CTRL + F5 and the problem should be cleared up. I changed the theme to what is actually the Miami skyline, but they haven't made a Rio theme yet, and I wanted to change it up a little, so you should see a purple background and a dark skyline with palm trees.

Mother's Day note

Dear Mom,

I hope you had a Happy Mother's Day, and I'm sorry I was so far away. Jon and I tried to coordinate a gift to split but we didn't quite get it together, and Dad wasn't very interested in helping, either. In any event, I'm sorry that all I could do was a card, but I'm writing to tell you that I've decided to come home in June, even though I will most likely come alone.

This will make my life considerably more difficult but I'd like to spend some time with you and the rest of the family before I come back here. I also would like to put your worries at ease because I'm not nearly as lost as you think. I'm mostly just frustrated at being broke and being powerless to immigration law which is making me and Eli's relationship rather challenging. I don't know what I want to do with "my" career, but I don't have to know yet. I'm still young and I reserve the right to be confused and broke until I'm 29, because that gives me a year to really get my shit together. I may seem lost but I have lots of dreams brewing, and I'm confident that at least one will pan out.

So I suggest you shift all of your worrying energy to my brother, and try to convince him to come back with me to Brazil, where I will find him an Amazonian shaman to try to get rid of his headaches. That or the mago up the street.

Love,
Rachel

Sunday updates and thank yous

First, I'd like to thank everyone who has made such sweet and generous offers to help us out. I'm actually considering taking some of you up on it, but I'll let you know next week. I really appreciate such kind words from people I've never even met.

Next, if you live in the NY tri-state area, I encourage you to check out my Portuguese Blog to read about an amazing Brazil exhibition at the South Street Seaport that began a few weeks ago and runs through July.

Finally, if you want to know more about the horrors below, go to my Rio Gringa Consulting website's "What's New in Rio" section to find out. If you'd like to be updated weekly about the latest trends, fashions, and hotspots in the city, leave a comment here. And if you are traveling or moving to Rio and need advice, email me at riogringaconsult at gmail dot com. I can help!

coming and going

Despite the difficulty of this week, we managed to get out of the house a bit to distract ourselves.

On Thursday night, we went out with our Swedish friend, his Brazilian roommate, and Eli's old friend who just got back after spending a year in Ireland (talk about culture shock). They were all wasted by the time I got there (Brazilians prefer the 40 oz bottle so they can pour it in individual glasses amongst a group, and I don't even want to tell you how many they'd gotten through). It was fun, nonetheless, chattering and gossiping, alternating between Portuguese and English.

Last night we went to my Canadian friend's goodbye party, which was also her roommate's birthday party. It was a luau on the beach in Ipanema, and the prospect made me nervous at first because it's generally not advisable to be on the beach after dark. But there was a large group of people so it turned out fine. In fact, it was really fun, despite the cold (yes, COLD). We ate and drank and listened to great Brazilian music and lay out on the beach under the stars. I thought back on those diary entries I'd read, about how lonely and anxious I was to be with Eliseu the long year we did long-distance. The prospect of having to do that again, which is a definite possibility, is just a little horrifying.

I hate goodbyes, so it was a little awkward when we left. My Canadian friend is in fact one of my few friends here so I was sad to see her go, though I too, may be leaving soon enough.

How it all began: Part VI

And so continues the saga of how I wound up in Brazil with a Brazilian man. I'm not sure how many parts I will need to get to the shocking revelation of how we actually met, a revelation that neither of our parents know and very few friends do, so you'll just have to keep reading.

We left off when I was a senior in high school and I'd just been rejected by all of the Ivy League colleges I'd applied to (I also applied to Duke, my mom reminded me last week).

Aside from the stress of figuring out what to do about college, that year was generally horrible. I was depressed from the break-up with my then boyfriend, who continued to torture me throughout the year, and to boot, my best friends slowly but surely began to "dump" me too, in a process nearly as bitter as the break-up because of the longevity and humiliation involved. I spent the last half of the year going to my classes, sleeping half the day, going to dance class, and going to bed.

But I couldn't put off deciding where to go to college. In the end, I realized just how much I'd loved GW from the first time I visited, and they had a great international relations program, which was exactly what I wanted to do. It was in a city, with tons of job opportunities and plenty of fun things to do. It fit me. Also, they'd also offered me a chunk of money that my parents where pretty excited about, so by April it was a done deal.

I could barely wait.

As I walked alone down the hill from my high school's football field after graduation, my cap teetering precariously on my head, I had no idea what was in store for me. I had no idea that all my prejudices and assumptions about what makes a "good" college would be shattered during my four years in DC, or that they would be some of the best years of my life. I had no idea I would meet my new best friends, or that I would travel the world. I had no idea that attending that particular school would put me directly on the path to meeting Eli and becoming an estranged expat. All I could think about then was getting the hell out of high school as quickly as my mud-stained stilettos could carry me.

pondering

The other night I dug out my journal, which I haven't written in for a long time since I share 90% of my life with family and total strangers on this blog. The journal starts the summer before my senior year of college, when I first met Eli. I was amazed by how quickly I said the "L" word and how certain I was of how good a person he is.

But I was also surprised by how much I complained about my last year of college. I miss college, and college is supposed to be fun. And it was, but senior year I was so incredibly stressed out I could barely enjoy it. I'd taken on too many classes and jobs and responsibilities and I was losing my marbles.

So now that I have the opposite problem, I wonder how I can somehow make my way to middle ground.

soap opera on our street

Since the creators of a very popular soap opera decided to convert two buildings on our street to be one of the most important locations on the show, they've been filming a couple times a week. It's helping me learn about the Brazilian TV industry.

When I left the house at 7:30, the production crew had arrived but instead of setting up, everyone was eating. Somebody had distributed plastic bags with a roll of bread, potato chips, and some other super healthy thing, and everyone was drinking Cokes. I guess they don't care about the crew getting fat. Then when I walked by again at 9:30, I almost walked right into the middle of a shot, where they were filming two of the younger characters from the show. Then I did it again when I walked by at lunchtime, when they were filming the same male character on a motorcycle. Later, Eli passed through with his friend and the two stars of the show were there filming, and his friend mentioned, a bit too loudly, that he'd seen the Play boy feature with the female actress. Smooth.

I noticed that besides the crew and producers, there always seem to be novela groupies, Barra types with huge sunglasses and expensive clothes hanging around trying to look cool but not actually doing anything. Maybe they have real jobs, but they do a whole lot of nothing.

Nonetheless, I get a small thrill from walking through the set every time, even though I pretend not to.

Caso Isabella: Back in the Can

Last night, the father and stepmother of the five year-old murdered in Sao Paulo in March went back to jail, after the prosecutor presented sufficient evidence for their arrest. The defense is going to ask for "habeas corpus" to get them out, but all signs are pointing to VERY VERY GUILTY. There's the evidence of the pieces of net from the window where the girl was thrown on the father's tee shirt, the blood stains, the witnesses  who overheard people fighting and a child screaming, the extreme lack of evidence of an intruder...it seems pretty clear cut to me. I guess a confession is out of the question?

In other news, one of the transvestites involved in the Ronaldo scandal has been offered two movie deals...in the adult film industry. This I discovered by reading a tacky 50 cent newspaper over someone's shoulder on the Metro. It's a terrible habit but I can't help it.

distracting myself

Did you know...

I love: Eli, maracuja with plain yogurt, and the view from my apartment 

I fear: terminal illnesses, being completely broke, and neoconservatives

One day, I hope to: start my own NGO, raise a puppy, and travel to Asia and Africa

I'm currently obsessed with: Chris Brown's "With You," jasmine tea, and Regiane Alves

What may surprise you to know is that I hate flamenco, I once aspired to be a pop star, and I have extremely little interest in visiting the Amazon.

*I miss: my family (including my dog), my best friends, and New York pizza

Hi are you Jeanne, Silvia, Emily, Anathalia, or Jenna? You've been e-tagged. To see how it's actually supposed to be done, see Daniela's original post. That's my brother and my dog above, in case you were wondering.

*my addition

(our) news

So this is what happened.

Eli got accepted by a reputable American organization's summer work program. He did everything last minute but the Brazilian recruiter said it would be fine, and then she sent him an email a few days later saying he'd been accepted and he would be given materials to apply for his visa. We were so happy and we started making plans to go to New York.

Then, the recruiter announced after Eli accepted the offer that there was a "recruiter" fee, a fee for helping him get the visa: US$500. This was not mentioned during the whole process, even after I talked to one of the directors in New York on the phone.

Eli was distressed but he kept applying for different jobs and kept in touch with the recruiter. Yesterday, we received all the visa application materials, and a few days earlier she sent him the job assignment (which is not good). There are a few other places that want to hire him, though, so we figured it would be ok. Also, the recruiter told him he'd have to go to Sao Paulo to get the visa, since the RJ consulate was supposedly not being helpful with this type of visa. I was helping Eli with the online visa application last night, and he did the first payment (to set up an interview) and was on the page to schedule the interview when he suddenly clicked it off. "I don't have enough money for this," he announced. "I can't do it." I asked him about his original plan to work in Europe for a few months, and he said he didn't have enough money for that either. Apparently his dad is making him pay for his last year of college, and the costs of the visa, recruiter fees, and airfare aren't possible.

So we are both currently at a complete loss. More lost than ever, really.